How much can you take??? #DealBreaker







We all have one, two, maybe even three things that are deal breakers for us. That one thing that make us realize we just can’t deal with it!!! We Won’t deal it. Or we simply choose NOT to deal with it. Whatever that deal breaker is for you….how far would you go compromise that deal breaker?! 

Truth is! We can gather up lists of things that we don’t like about something or someone…However when LOVE is involved things start to change. We start doing things, and accepting things that we once said we would NEVER deal with. Now that I have been through many different relationships their some things that I used to say I wouldn’t deal with that I can now tolerate. The real question is HOW MUCH CAN YOU TAKE? Especially when it’s dealing with someone you LOVE. Do you trust God that those DEAL BREAKERS will eventually fade away? Or do you walk away from someone or something that could potentially be the best thing that ever happened to you? 

In my opinion sometimes we go too far with things we say we just “CAN’T DEAL WITH” from a MAN or a WOMAN. On the other hand while we spend so much time focusing on the things that we “CAN’T DEAL WITH” from other people…..have you ever stopped and looked within yourself to see if your plate is squeaky clean!?!? Are you dotting every I and crossing every T in your life to put such a demand on other people when your in a relationship?!?! Could this be the main thing that could keep us alone in the future?!?

How much can you take? What are your ultimate Deal breakers in a Relationship!! For me, I cannot tolerate a Self-Centered Man, Cheating Man, someone who doesn’t have a relationship with Christ, someone who isn’t family oriented, and who has kids…just to name a few. Now No offense to anyone who can tolerate the things that I won’t. To each its own. In saying that, If someone came in my life who wasn’t family oriented but was willing to break out of his shell to do family things then that’s someone I am willing to work with. The same with a person who doesn’t have a relationship with Christ. Whose to say that he’s not meant for me just because he doesn’t go to church..but may have a good heart or is simply an overall good person?!?! If he is really into me then he will eventually start getting into the things that’s apart of me-Which is Jesus. 

The point I’m trying to make is that I’ve realized in life that everyone may not be moving to the beat that we think they should. But-does that Truly mean that God isn’t in the midst?!? Could it be that you have to help that person change?! The possibilities are endless, you just have to thoroughly think it over before you decide to end your relationship with someone just because their not where you think they should be. 

*To those who have concrete evidence and know in your heart that you’re making the right decision by walking away-I Applaud you!!! To those who are on the fence about someone or something in your life. Really take the time out to access what it is you’re truly walking away from. Sometimes we decide to run because of FEAR. Fear of getting hurt again. Fear of not amounting up to what we should be for that person. Fear of failing. 

To those who know that you should be with a certain someone or something-but is allowing FEAR to move you. I pray now that you release the doubts and the fears in your heart. I pray that you find peace, and accept what God has for you. God grant them understanding to know that you will never leave them nor forsake them. If you brought them to this point in their life, help them to trust that you will see them through it. 



What if it was you?

One of my customers at work would always come in and never say a word but he would signal me to continue smiling. However, one day caught me by surprise. He told me good morning. I was shocked because he never said a word. I told him how happy I was to hear his voice and he mentioned that it was 10years since the last time he said his last word. My heart went out to him because I quickly thought what if it was me who was silenced forcefully and not allowed to speak?! How would I react if my voice, freedom to speak was suddenly snatched away from me?! I realized how the simple things are sometimes taken for granted until we no longer have it anymore. My mind opened and I gained a greater appreciation for life. The sweet grace of life that God has given us should never be taken for granted. Sad to say that I’m guilty of sometimes being rebellious and living my own way. Though I’m grateful that God’s grace renew each and everyday for us so that we can repen

t for our sins and move forward.

No matter how long you’ve been living life and take taking it and God for granted. You can start today by asking God for forgiveness and moving forward in him.

What if it was you who was suddenly stripped of something you so desperately needed? How would you deal with it? I’m looking forward to your responses.

Written in love,
Ms. Spicy







As I sit here in tears watching the Crucifixion of Christ as he traveled from preaching, getting beaten to carrying his cross etc. A new revelation just came over me. As they drove the nails in him to pin him to the cross–they didn’t truly realize what they were doing. They jokingly crowned him KING and nailed him to that cross, and used rope to RAISE HIM UP while on the cross. Little did they know they was preparing him to be RAISED UP by GOD. They played an important role in his life before he would officially, and eternally sit on the right hand of GOD. BUT-Truth is. Jesus was KING & RAISED UP before all of this ever took place-it was ordained by GOD. 

I can’t help but point out an important fact in your life and even mine. Many people don’t realize that when they THINK they’re hurting us by doing many things to try (Some may even succeed) to knock us down–they’re only preparing us for the greater blessing that God has for us. In order to see the BIGGER picture as Jesus did we must stay focused on the mission that we’re on. Let’s think for a second if Jesus got distracted and off focus by the many people calling him a liar, and a blasphemer. He would have missed the most important reason for his being. He came that WE may have LIFE and have it more ABUNDANTLY. He came to SAVE us from DARKNESS so that we may enter into his Everlasting life. 

To all whose reading this post. No matter how hard the journey is or has been- let’s not loose sight of why God has us in these positions. Whatever your mission is- Complete it! Finish the race, carry out your assignment! God is right beside us seeing us through. Though the pain may be great doesn’t mean that God isn’t there. Take Jesus for example, he prayed that God would take that cup of suffering away from him, but because God sent him here for a specific purpose, an assignment, a mission. God allowed that suffering to happen not to change people lives for a MOMENT- but for FOREVER! Through CHRIST an ENTIRE WORLD can be saved, they just have to accept him into their lives as their SAVIOR. 

Your appointed time to come out of your mission, assignment, & to fulfill purpose is near- we must carry it out as Jesus did! Don’t give up, don’t get weary (Although we will- but the key to not getting weary is pushing past the PAIN. Don’t dwell in it). It’s almost over! Don’t fight the process, there’s a BLESSING IN THE STORM!!!!



Written in Love,

Ms. Spicy


A little something I call TEXT-ATIONSHIP!!!!



Ladies and Gents…I want your honest opinion about this matter. If you’ve went through this or is going through it, or may know someone please share your experiences or thoughts.


In this day and age I’m finding that many people are using texting as their MAIN form of communication. Don’t get me wrong, whoever invented this whole idea of sending a text message was brilliant because it comes in handy on so many different levels. However, I totally disagree with those who use texting as a way to express their true feelings about someone they love- simply because you can never truly understand someone through a text message. For example, there is this show that comes on MTV called CATFISH and it’s basically about people who are in actual TEXT-ATIONSHIPS with people who they’ve never met and may have only talked to once. The flip side to the show is that nine times out of ten they met these people through social media and the person who their posing as often times isn’t their actual identity. I’ve seen episodes where women pose as men, thick women pose as slim models etc. The bottom line is their hiding behind their true identity through texting.

I couldn’t wrap my mind around the fact that they say there in love with someone who’s been only texting them for 2 maybe even 3 years without ever seeing them in person or talking to them regularly on the phone. I don’t know about you but I love to communicate over the phone. I am a talker and any man who will ever have a chance at my heart have to be one as well. When you hear someone’s voice you’re able to get a better understanding of the what they’re saying but most importantly the context in which their saying it in. Texting is the complete opposite; words can be misinterpreted and totally taken out of content. In my opinion texting can be used in many different ways but not for expressing your true love for someone. That is something that should be talked over the phone, not through a message.


Do we settle for this form of communication because it’s common??

Have we handicapped ourselves of verbally communicating because texting is so convenient?


When a man or woman MAIN form of communicating with you is through a text then it can most definitely be looked at as you’re falling for someone who’s already in a relationship, your falling for their SWEET NOTHINGS, and can also be looked at as if they can be hiding behind their true identity by only texting you. Some people are not man or woman enough to tell you verbally how they feel so they would rather text it. It’s comfortable to Pretend, it’s convenient to Pretend…that is why texting has become such a MAIN STREAM in people’s lives. I could easily text someone and lie and say that “I Love you”, “I miss you”, etc. Take the show CATFISH for example, some of them spend years of their lives ONLY texting someone who they’ve never met and say there in love with. How could that be?  I know why, because it’s easy to fall victim to WORDS!  Anyone can talk a GOOD GAME but when it’s time to show action———That’s when the test gets real. The show Catfish was created by a man name NEV and his friend, their role is to find out if the person behind the TEXT-ATIONSHIPS is actually real. Some cases are proven true, and many MANY fall by the waist side in the category of FAKE!!!!!! Meaning these people have only fallen in love with Lies that someone was feeding them.

Do we continue to settle for SWEET NOTHINGS!! Or do we recognize that texting true feelings about love and how you deeply feel for someone shouldn’t be explained through a text? That should be reserved for either in person, or a phone call.




I DID, You CAN, We WILL!!!!!!





Growing up as a young girl I longed for my father to be in my life, no matter how many times he let me down I never stopped anticipating his arrival. As I grew up I realized that I was only hoping for failure because there were times that he promised to come but never showed up. This affected me more ways than not because I looked for love from a man as a young girl. Eventually my dad would come around but he wasn’t around as much as I needed him. I’m seeing a lot of this in the world today, young girls going astray or acting out because of the absence of a father. I cherish my mother’s role in my life but raising a child is designed to be a two way street between a mother and a father. However, although this is something that has been the down fall of many families, I still believe that we can rise above the negative’s in our life and still grow up and be what God wants us to be.

God put on my heart to not only share that we can overcome, but actually explain how. The only way I got my breakthrough was to talk about my hurt. We can never truly move forward without confronting our pain, don’t let it linger in your heart because it only produces bitterness in the end. I talked it over with those in my inner circle; they were my therapy believe it or not. When I was hurting from this situation I would express that to them and they helped me heal. So talk it over with someone you trust, most importantly it’s time for forgive one you confront the pain. Un-forgiveness can set us back more than we imagine. We must forgive them even though they did us wrong. At 21 apart of me still missed the love that I had hoped to get from my father but because I talked about my pain I didn’t allow anger to build inside of me because he was gone. Therefore, I understand what I want for my children in the future. God can turn this pain into something powerful for our children because it only makes us determined to fight for their lives to turn out better than ours.

We have the power within us to allow God to shape and mold us into who he made us to be instead of going astray because of what’s missing in our lives. The bible says in Romans 8:28 And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them”.  With that being said, the things that we lack in our life can be transformed into the stepping stones that we climb in order to reach our Destiny. For example, due to the absence of my father there’s a major passion in my heart to mentor young girls who grew up just like I did in the hopes of helping them better themselves. I didn’t let his absence stop me, here I am 21 a sophomore in college and about to start my very own clothing line for young girls before I graduate.

After turning to Christ and allowing him to transform my life, I may not have my father in my life but I have Peace. I may have not had the best upbringing but I’m still in route towards my Destiny.


*Ms. Spicy Moment:

I say to the fatherless young woman whose life is being affected by the absence of their father-YOU CAN STILL RISE ABOVE WHAT YOUR LIFE IS LACKING!!! I STAND WITH YOU THROUGH YOUR STRUGGLE OF NOT HAVING YOUR FATHER BECAUSE I STILL DON’T HAVE MINE- BUT WE WON’T LET THAT HANDICAP US OF OUR FUTURE.  I AM, YOU ARE, WE ARE—SURVIVORS, WITH OR WITHOUT THEM BEING THERE!! THROUGH GOD ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                       







Every year I reflect on the last and think back on how far I’ve come. This is year has been filled with so much that I can’t believe that it’s actually over. Big things are about to happen for me with my career that I’m excited about what God is about to do. I can honestly say that I wanted to give up so many times but the God within me continued to give me strength in the midst of my pain. I won’t give you all an entire list of what my resolutions will be because I will let my actions speak louder than my words. However, I must say that “I WILL APPROACH THIS NEW YEAR UNAFRAID TO TAKE RISKS, PURSUE MY CAREER FULL FORCE HOLDING NOTHING BACK, AND CHOOSE LOVE BEYOND ALL DOUBTS”. 

I realized that I allowed a lot of fear to cloud my vision and get me off track time after time. This is something that I’m not proud about but I’m glad that I’m honest with God and myself about what my downfalls were for this year. My mind is open to the opportunities that God will present and I will go for them with no regrets. I thank you all for taking the time out to read what I have to say and understand my views even if you all don’t agree.

I pray nothing but the best for each and everyone of you, and if this was my last post in life I would tell you all to choose LOVE BEYOND ALL DOUBTS. Have no fear for the future with someone you LOVE. If ya’ll keep God in the middle, let ya’ll hearts beat as one and let nothing stop it. Believe that through Christ ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE, no matter how hard it may actually be or seem. Let God guide your life in the path that was destined and don’t fight the process. Open up your heart to LOVE no matter what your past may have done to you. Although, the skies may seem gray today, just HOLD ON….the forecast is bound to change.

Written in love,

*Ms. Spicy

Don’t allow the WEIGHT of the WAIT…pull you down!!!!

Out of everything that God has done in my life there’s been this one area of my life that I cannot seem to get the victory in. Although, each time this situation presented itself, I didn’t always do what needed to be done in order to conquer what needed to be conquered–& I took full responsibility for that!!! How many of you know that God is a God of another chance?!??! With that being said, while WAITING on my opportunity again, I must admit that it gets hard for me because, in the midst of waiting there’s many things around me daily that try to get get me off focus, and sometimes I must admit that it get tempting to get off focus and just do my own thing. One day as I was talking with my God mother, God put something on my heart that I just couldn’t resist sharing with you all….“Don’t loose yourself in the WAIT. Don’t let the WEIGHT of WAITING get you down.” 

That quote is powerful because I was starting to allow the Weight of waiting to actually weigh me down which almost lead me to act of desperation and move out of turn. I’m not sure if any of you ever got tired of waiting and ended up doing your own thing but let me be the one to tell you that…moving out of God’s will, moving out of turn can turn a 6 day journey into living 40 years in the wilderness just like the people in Egypt in the bible. We can prolong our process and actually make the waiting period longer when we take matters in our own hands.

As I washing dishes a few minutes ago, I felt myself getting tired of waiting and feeling like I couldn’t go on….BUT GOD!!! He always reminds me that he’s right here with me although I can’t feel or trace him. He knows mY struggle, he knows that I’m getting tired, he knows exactly where I’m at in my life. Likewise with whoever is reading this post. God understands our pain, he see’s our tears, and most of all hears our prayers. He also reminded me that his timing is not our timing, and his ways are not our ways, and that in order for him to complete the good work he placed within me—it REQUIRES me to wait. When I was living my own way, and following my own rules–I never waited for anything. I wanted things right then and there. Now that I’m saved, and living for Christ…he doesn’t operate the way that I think he should, nor do I have the power to rush his timing. Therefore, instead of complaining, I started to give God praise for what I wanted, and thanked him in advance for it. I started feeling better about my situation and he assured me that he was still right beside me waiting right along with me.

*Ms. Spicy Moment:

Our WAITING SEASON can be one of the most hardest seasons of our lives, but it’s in this season that God perfects what needs to be fixed in our lives. If we move out of turn, and get out of line–We can end up pursuing something that we’re really not ready to have at this time. It’s Coming!! You don’t have long left to WAIT!! But while your WAITING ON GOD…Don’t allow the WEIGHT of WAITING wear you down to the point that you can’t go on. Praise is our Weapon–Use it & Watch God change things….trust me, if he don’t change your situation, he’ll change you in it!!!!!

Hebrews 12:1

New Living Translation (NLT)

12 ….let us strip off every WEIGHT that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us.

Written in Love,

Ms. Spicy